My youngest son was invited to a sleepover at his friend's house. It wasn't for a birthday party or anything significant but four friends who wanted to hang out. But even before my kids were born, we had a house rule: our kids were not allowed to spend the night at a friend's home unless we trusted the parents and the kids very well. Kids are welcome to sleep here, which they have, but our kids are not allowed to sleep over at someone else's place. I have read too many articles and studies about unfortunate situations in those environments. We have kept this rule until this past weekend. My husband and I discussed it; we prayed about it but leaned on opposite sides. We didn't know the parents or the kids all that well. Yes, they went to church together, but that didn't mean very much. I invited our two older kids into the conversation to hear their thoughts. They could've easily told me I had nothing to worry about and to let their brother sleep at his friend's house, but they didn't. They provided mature and wise feedback not to me but to their brother. They asked him questions that I didn't even think of. They gave him suggestions on how to alleviate some of my concerns. What I loved about the conversation was they put the responsibility back on their brother. After listening to their discussion, reviewing some ground rules, and praying over my son, we allowed him to go, and he had fun. It was encouraging to witness their thought process. I loved how they thought of their brother's well-being (emotionally, physically, and spiritually) and not just his social status. It was like they were helping us be better parents. There was another time when they stepped it up a notch. In the past, during one of our weekly Sunday Facetime calls, my youngest expressed his interest in opening a social media account. He shared how I'm not in favor, and right when I was ready to pull out my growing list of reasons why it wasn't a good idea, my older kids chimed in agreement and listed their valid points. Sometimes, it helps my younger son to understand better when it comes from his older siblings. As much as I would love to step back in time and see my kids as toddlers again, there is a sweet spot to watch them grow as mature and wise adults. I'm thankful they can invest in each other and see the fruits of their labor.
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